The Fastest Man On Earth
Hillary says she won Michigan fairly despite it being against the rules, no one campaigned there, and her only competition being Dennis Kucinich and those stripped delegates should be awarded and seated at the convention.
By her logic, I am the fastest man on earth.
You see, I almost missed the bus this morning. I hate missing the bus so I ran for it. There was another guy next to me and he ran for the bus too. I beat him to the bus. I am therefore the fastest man on earth because I beat the only competition that happened to show up despite everyone thinking we weren’t really racing and there was nothing on the line.
If Hillary becomes the nominee I should get a freaking gold metal for my pointless victory over lackluster limited competition that had no reason to believe we were competing.
