Smell
Living on my own I went through many stages, accomplishments if you will. The first was finding a place and then pulling off the move. Of course I had a bit of a false start so I had to do that twice. But then once I settled in to my very own place an evolution began.
First it was about survival. I don’t mean to sound overly dramatic but it’s a good word for it. Having food to eat without having to resort to going out or ordering in and being able to do what I needed to work like sleep, shower, and laundry. See the money come in and go out and realize you’re okay.
Then came entertainment. Getting the TV, computer, surround sound, cable, etc set up.
Then after all that came style. Creativity, personality, pride. This was more than getting by, it was something to be proud of. One of the first things I did in this era was to get one of those Plug-in Night lights, the scented kind that doesn’t take up a socket. From that point on whenever I came home it wasn’t just to the place I sleep but a home that I had made my own. It was like it welcomed me when I came in the door.
It signaled a period of building the place up with a new computer desk, throw rug, couch, computer chair, and eventually coffee table. Everyone in my building who saw my place complimented me on it. Even my landlord said he’d never seen someone do so much with the space. It was really nice to come home and have a reason to smile.
I’ve said it before, it’s like that Depeche Mode song, In Your Room. “Where time stands still or moves at your will” I was largely in complete control, most of the time.
Now, living with other people one of whom cannot be reasoned with, you can’t help but feel a loss of control by comparison. It’s not that I resent it per se, I know the value of compromise and all that but I still find myself missing it on occasion.
Shortly after my son was born he developed something called Cradle Cap, essentially he had skin irritation on his scalp. The doctor said that oftentimes this is caused or made worse by fragrances. Baby’s skin is new, never been exposed to anything so a negative response isn’t too surprising. So I unplugged the nearly spent plug in.
We got all sorts of advice from oil of all different kinds to special creams and other things as possible treatment, some from medical professionals. Eventually it was revealed that all those treatments were placebo meant to keep over worried parents busy. This annoyed me as it implies a limited intelligence or self control on the part of the parents. I found it a little insulting to be honest, to say nothing of a waste of money, time, and patience.
I would much rather be told “don’t worry about it” than be given busy work. I’m an adult, the Doc says don’t worry then I won’t. But I digress.
Eventually it passed and it occurred to me it was probably safe to set up the plug in again. It took me awhile to get around to it but just a few days ago but the difference was striking, and to most probably a little weird. Yea the hallway smelled good but big deal right?
Well it actually had a…I don’t want to say significant so let’s go with noticeable improvement on my mood. A nice smell to greet you when you come home, a reminder of good times…I guess you could say I felt like I had regained some measure of control. Suddenly chores didn’t seem like something to sap my energy and time but an opportunity to improve my living space.
I guess it reminded me of when I was able to make a large impact on my living space without a huge amount of effort or expense and it was all for and because of me, being master of your our destiny and all that. A time when I knew best. It somehow made current challenges seem more manageable.
Quite a large impact for something so small. I guess that’s just me. Taking simple enjoyment out of the little things. Maybe that’s why I like taking things a bit at a time. Some people want everything in place right away but that’s not me. I enjoy the process. The thing we got this week made things a bit (or alot) better than the week before so why not enjoy the difference? Bask in it a little. If you get everything at once you can miss the joy of each piece.
And you can still enjoy the whole package when it’s all done, perhaps even more for an appreciation of how each bit makes things better.
Okay, vote now, scale of 1 to 10 how weird am I?
