Grazing Rites

“My life’s a trial. I’m not denying that every little bit hurts. It’s a problem that I’m not solving; don’t mind admitting I feel like quitting this job for awhile, getting away, before it gets any worse today” -Pet Shop Boys ‘In Denial’

In ‘Orlando Information’ I showed you how to save money, what weather to expect, how to get around, highlighted an improv murder mystery attraction, and covered your duty-free allowance. In ‘Event Planner’ I explained how more fun can come from a larger and more diverse group, to say nothing of additional savings on things like a rental car (less than $10 per day per person!). In ‘Timezones!’ I explained how the travel time wasn’t so bad. In ‘Orlando Early Planning’ I explained the brilliance of the plan and in ‘Book Now’ I gave careful step-by-step instructions on how to get the deal.

So, the question remains, why haven’t you booked yet?

Oh wait, I know. The price. In ‘Book Now’ and ‘Travel Market Fluctuations’ I talked about how the price had gone up by $60-$150 per person. Yes, I could see how that would be quite discouraging. But the funny thing about market fluctuations is that they’re dynamic in both directions. What does that mean? Well, it means the price can go up OR DOWN.

And it has.

Gone down.

Currently expedia.ca is offering the exact same trip we booked for only $24 more per person. Oh and get this, you’d only have one connection to make going there whereas we have to make two. So for $24 more per person you get spared a stopover. Is this a better deal than the one I got? I leave that for you to decide but no matter how you slice it, $596 CDN per person for a week in Orlando is pretty damn sweet.

You’re running out of excuses NOT to treat yourself to this. Don’t you deserve it? Don’t you work hard? Isn’t the Vancouver winter a little depressing? Wouldn’t it be great to have some fond memories of sun, fun, and water parks to look back on to get you through the grey haze that is just a few months away?

Oh and I think I can get you a deal on travel medical insurance, something in the neighbourhood of 35% less than a bank would charge.

See? Not only am I, your humble blogger, looking out for your spiritual, emotional, and physical health but I’m also looking out for your wallet. Why not take advantage of it? When you travel with me, you have precious little to worry about. My research skills are well known, I can’t think of a road trip I’ve been on that my Navigator’s Clipboard hasn’t added to the enjoyment of. Remember my Vegas vacation? Pulled that off without a hitch! Planned it all myself, from the train to the hotels to the concert to the flights on different airlines and everything else and that was WAY more complicated than this trip.

Yes, I’ve never been to Orlando but I had never been to Vegas either. And you haven’t been to Orlando either, why not fix that? When I was in Europe my brother-in-law went on at length about how much fun he had in Orlando. We were in Europe, like gazillion times more expensive and it was all he could talk about! (Okay, I admit it was only like one rainy day in Prague he was going on about Orlando but nevertheless he himself said I should make Orlando my next destination).

Consider if you will my Anaheim trip. Disneyland with no wait longer than 10-15 minutes and most rides with no wait at all. I’m not promising anything but just think about it logically for a moment, why would the east coast be any different from the west coast? I tell you September is the month to travel. It’s the cheapest time and the smallest crowds, it can’t be beat.

Just to give you an idea of how prepared a traveler I am, I have a power converter that works in any car. So you can plug anything from a cell phone to a laptop in to charge in any car in the world and I don’t even drive. If we plan to rent a car you can bet I’ll be bringing that just for the convenience.

And the attractions speak for themselves. A small army of amusement parks to fit every personality: Disney World for the Burtons, Sea World for the Jons and Mindis, and Universal Studios for, well, who doesn’t like Universal Studios? I mean, look at this for god’s sake: http://www.geocities.com/cow_manx/flume.jpg

That’s from Anaheim but they’ve got the same ride in Orlando. In fact my preliminary research indicates they’ve got rides that make this thing look like the kiddie swings.

When I go on a trip, it’s an adventure. Harnessing the powers of Calvin for example Jon and I met Jay Leno: http://www.geocities.com/cow_manx/jay.jpg

Even got his autograph on a free pad that I won in a trivia contest! http://www.geocities.com/cow_manx/leno.jpg

So why am I mentioning all of this now? Two reasons. Firstly tomorrow is the day seat assignments are made for our flights, and yours too if you get booked. You want that window or aisle seat? Book now for the best possible chance.

Oh and that second reason? I’m planning to begin the real research next week. That’s right. I’ve found an insane deal the sharing of which drops jaws. I’ve found free discount cards and coupon books and attractions most people never would have been aware of and I haven’t even started to get serious yet.

I know, it’s only a week. And I don’t intend of planning things in great detail, the itinerary will likely only include things like flights but my experience has only solidified my belief that superior knowledge makes for a superior experience. I’m not going to plan what we’re going to do when, we’ll go where the spirit takes us. But when the spirit moves us towards any particular thing you can turn to me for anything you need to know about it and how to do it as cheaply as possible.

And I have the technology backing me up. My PDA with Pocket Streets and any data I pre-load from maps to contact numbers and directions. Digital Camera, 4.1 mega pixel with over a gig of memory plus zoom and panoramic lenses (if mommy lends them to me). Oh and it can capture video just fine. Here’s a nice little sample for you: http://s157.photobucket.com/albums/t46/cow_manx/?action=view&current=MOV01428.flv

If Burton and Jon join us our powers only multiply. Technologically speaking Burton has his laptop and Jon his camcorder. Both are excellent drivers that can probably save time on commutes. And they’re both a hell of a lot of fun.

So there’s a hell of a lot of reasons and advantages to going and very few reasons not to. It’s not even a solid week so any school or work you’ll miss will be the last 2 days of one week and the first 3 of the next. If I play my cards right I won’t miss any days of work so the opportunity cost is insanely low too (I’ll only be doing 4 days of work a week then anyways).

And you’re not exactly tied to our plans either. Say you only want to go for 6 days instead of a week and stay at a different hotel? Price drops to as low as $532 CDN. 5 days and a different hotel? $516 CDN. Join us for all or part of the trip, it’s up to you. But look at it this way, a week works out to $85 a day, 6 days is $88 a day, and 5 days $103 a day so the week is by far the better value. But I understand people have different budgets and different priorities, that won’t hold you back from sharing the fun.

Alright, I admit I’m selling it a little hard here but I’m not doing it for me - this is a message from you in an alternate future who never went on this trip: you’re kicking yourself, believe me.

Oh and I will mercilessly torture you with pictures and video and stories of the fun you could have had, but didn’t.

This entry was posted on June 19, 2007 at 3:33 pm and is filed under Travel. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.