CSR: Miami
In a bank awash in orange light…
Customer: I need to make a withdrawal
Horatio: You have no idea
Customer: Uh, what?
Horatio: *takes off glasses and looks at them* You need to feed your little habit don’t you?
Customer: Why do you wear sunglasses indoors?
Horatio: You have a thing for little girls don’t you?
Customer: Well actually yes, I’m taking my 2 daughters to Disneyworld.
Horatio: But this time it went too far, didn’t it?
Customer: Well, I guess I do spoil them. Look, are you going to give me my money or do I have to speak to your manager?
Horatio: My people thrive on consequences
Customer: What?
Horatio: *takes out wallet* Don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of your little “trip”…but this has to be the last time. You have a chance to get your life back, are you going to blow it?
Customer: Um, no?
At another wicket a customer approaches a male teller in a stylish dress shirt with the top 3 buttons undone…
Customer: I think someone is writing cheques in my name
Teller: Really… *dons a lab coat as Horatio walks by*
Horatio: What do we have here?
Teller: The Vic says someone’s passing bad cheques on her account
Customer: Excuse me, my name isn’t Vic, it’s Sam.
Horatio: *intensely* Your story better check out.
Customer: Is that supposed to be a joke? Look this cheque bounced, the note on the returned cheque says it was for a chess set.
Teller: *grabs the cheque with tongs* don’t disturb my crime scene *shows Horatio the cheque*
Horatio: $300 for a chess set? Looks like someone’s living like a King in a Castle with you the unknowing Pawn
Customer: *unimpressed* very droll. Look can we just find out who tried to cash this? I have my cousin’s Bar Mitzvah this evening.
Horatio: So we only have until Knight? Why are you in such a hurry to leave? Maybe you wrote the cheque!
Customer: *snaps fingers* you’re right! I did! The chess set was for my cousin! I remember now. How could I have forgotten?
Horatio: How indeed. You’re living like a Queen but now even the Bishop can’t help you.
Customer: Look, I get it, the chess puns, but I’m clearly Jewish, we don’t have Bishops.
Horatio: Checkmate.
Customer: *to Teller* Has he suffered a stroke lately or something?
Horatio: Rook.
Customer: Oookay. I’m leaving now.
In a back room of the bank with blue lighting an African woman and a blonde woman with a southern accent are arguing…
African: Look for the last time, I’ve never worked at a radio station, okay?
Blonde: Alright, if you say so. *takes out a half-eaten ham sandwich and hands it to her* Can you tell me what happened to this?
African: Well it looks like someone ate it.
Blonde: Huh. Hey did you ever live in New York?
African: *slams sandwich down on the counter* No! I’m telling you I NEVER worked at a radio station in New York.
Horatio: *walking in on the argument looks at the sandwich* Food fight?
