Grazing Rites

Why do pregnant women rub their belly? I’ve noticed some tend to do this even before they begin to show. I mean, there must be some reason behind it or is it entirely subconscious? Does the zygote sense this somehow? Is it soothing? Does it generate some kind of positive, comforting, or stimulating vibration within the womb? Is it like petting a cat? Is it for luck?

Or, at the risk of becoming unpopular, is it a subtle way of reminding people you’re pregnant? You might think this an odd thing to ponder but as I was riding the bus home the other day this lady (and I use the term loosely) seemed to want everyone to know.

She was sitting at the back of the bus talking so loudly that you couldn’t help but overhear. I, for example, sitting in the middle of the bus listening to music, heard every word. First she frets about being $30 short for rent. Then she complains loudly that her boyfriend is in a crack-induced haze so he can’t come out and party tonight.

A fellow passenger, about my age, made the mistake of turning around and asking her to speak more quietly.

Her response?

“You were checking out my ass when I got on the bus. You were listening in on our conversation and thought I was hot so you turned around to check me out but, oops, I’m pregnant”

I felt very sorry for the fellow so I turned around and said “no, you’re loud” as I shared a commiserating look with the guy he turned a lighter shade of red.

She came back with “whatever, you wanted me too until you found out I was pregnant” she turned to her friend and continued complaining loudly about how “everyone wants my ass, I have the hottest ass“.

I wish it had ended there.

She followed me onto the skytrain. Fearing public humiliation might be in the offing I kept an eye on her reflection. She would stare at someone and keep rubbing her belly until they, either intentionally or not, glanced in her direction and she would yell “ya, I’m pregnant“.

With every rub of her belly I wanted to strangle her. You know, between the tears I’d be weeping for humanity.

This entry was posted on October 3, 2006 at 3:50 pm and is filed under Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.