Grazing Rites

In honor of the subject matter of the film I shall strive for ruthless honesty in this review.

Let me say, straight off, that this is NOT just a film for fans of Ricky Gervais. Yes he wrote it. Yes he directed it. Yes he starred in it. Okay, I’m not helping make my point here. The point is if you’re expecting something as dry as Extras don’t worry – this film actually has a very broad appeal – probably much broader than its given credit for. It’s actually incredibly smart but in a very accessible manner. It gives you something to think about and a lot to laugh about.

For me the journey to see this film was a long one. For months an ad for the film prominently displaying Rob Lowe (whom I enjoy) has been staring me in the face on my daily commute. A big poster right across from me on the skytrain platform right where I wait for the perfect doors to make my trip as easy and efficient as possible. Every day I found myself thinking “I want to see that. I bet I’d really enjoy that. Probably won’t happen”. Well it wasn’t until I found myself bored in Tukwila on a fall minibreak that I came across a mobile movie times website on my PDA that brought the nearby showing to my attention.

In fact our experience was probably rather unique. We were the only ones in the theatre until about 5 or 10 minutes before the film was to start when two other people entered. They actually got up and left before the film had even reached the midpoint. They whispered something to the usher on their way out and never returned. They’re obviously fools but it meant my friend and I could be as obnoxious as we wanted since we had the place to ourselves but other than pointing out gazillions of awesome cameos we were really quiet because the film was just that engrossing.

I actually figured out a way this story could be plausible. Sodium Pentothal makes you tell the truth, right? Well what if this parallel earth’s entire freshwater supply had naturally occurring Sodium Pentothal in it? Then let’s say that Ricky Gervais’ character has a genetic anomaly (or evolutionary mutation if you will) that prevents him from absorbing the Sodium Pentothal into his system. Boom, there you go. Entire movie plausible – that’s your suspension of disbelief on a silver platter, now go enjoy the film.

(Spoiler Alert! And sorry for the lack of warning in my District 9 review. My bad.)

One thing I found slightly disappointing or at least counter intuitive is that he ends up with Jennifer Garner’s character. The fact is she’s a cow. He should have found someone with a soul rather than essentially train her to fake it. Very disappointing but I suppose if she’s the female lead it wouldn’t do very well to dump her two-thirds of the way through the film to find someone better like say, I don’t know I think Renee Zellweger or someone could have played a better partner for him. But I digress.

So in conclusion, see this film. If for no other reason than I guarantee you will see a cameo from at least one actor you enjoy. That is, of course, assuming you have any taste.

This movie is kind of weird. It starts off great, stays great for about the first half or three-quarters and then just goes nuts and you walk away from it hardly knowing what to think of it.

The acting is first-rate, there are no questions there. Damon and Bakula are fantastic. Joel McHale makes a wonderful transition from his frequent comedic appearances on Countdown to the big screen – I look forward to seeing more of him in the future. And if you, like me, remember him from Almost Live! well, then you score some major points in my books.

This film also has some great cameos, so, enjoy that.

It’s just…it’s hard to describe. It’s based on a true story so it’s rather limited it what it could do from a plot perspective so if the  ending  leaves you a little unfulfilled, disappointed, or confused well, that’s life.

It’s one of those movies you see once and you’re good. So call it a rental I guess.

On December 30th 2008 I made 5 New Year’s resolutions…
1) Never buy parkay margarine again
2) See a dentist
3) Save money
4) Help my girlfriend get a newer car
5) Have a kickass vacation

Let’s have a status report.

1) Never buy parkay margarine again
Done.

2) See a dentist
Just booked an appointment today for next week, this was the last thing on the list really. It’s been hanging over my head for both months and years – months as a resolution, years as a general responsibility.

Now I have plenty of excuses, most of which hover around having no dental insurance for years, then having an unknown status of coverage due to the crappy communication of a former union at a former workplace. Then recently I got on Mindi’s plan but I waited a bit because we were unclear on when exactly the dental kicked in. But since I made the resolution to see a dentist last December the only remaining excuses were finding a dentist, figuring out the cost (as this insurance reimburses after the fact), and scheduling. The first two remaining roadblocks were removed at the insistence and assistance of my staff, which just left scheduling. November was the perfect time as my scheduling is reasonably flexible but here it is halfway through the month and I was still putting it off.

To be clear I don’t fear the dentist – I fear the dentist’s bill (that’s bill, not drill). And my last dentist became some sort of marketing madman near the end, constantly trying to sell me things I didn’t need so I also fear the sales pitch. But after all this time I suppose I am also afraid they’ll find something or give me a lecture. But as much as I feel ashamed for leaving it for so long I do feel proud at finally biting the bullet (pardon the pun) and getting this thing scheduled. It’s overcoming all that inertia that’s often the hardest part. Plus I found a great deal, essentially half off plus cancer and gum disease screening so at least one way or another I’ll know my dental status. And they guarantee the visit will not last more than 90 minutes so if they start in to a sales pitch and I’ll just watch the clock and go to a happy place in my head until the clock runs out.

3) Save money
This is relative but always a good idea and goal. So it really depends on how you look at it. If you want to go with pure numbers I’m about $2,100 down from this time last year however when you consider that since then I have bought a new HDTV, blu-ray player, car (and repairs and maintenance), and engagement ring not to mention gone on 2 minibreaks and an awesome vacation which I essentially paid for 2 people I’d say that’s pretty good. Frankly looking back I have absolutely no idea how I did it. So if you consider the value of the things purchased…heck, forget everything else but the car and I still come out ahead so let’s call this one complete.

4) Help my girlfriend get a newer car
Well I ended up not so much “helping” as “buying” the car but either way call that a win

5) Have a kickass vacation
Have you seen the videos? Mission freaking accomplished.

As for resolutions for the coming year? Well it’s way too early to speculate with any degree of confidence although I think it’s a safe bet #1 and #3 will make appearances. #5 will probably be modified slightly to “have a kickass 30th birthday vacation (possibly in London)”. I’ve had and completely 2 medical resolutions in the last two years (optometrist last year, dentist this year) so I think perhaps I’ll give that a break maybe have something about general physical fitness, doing something special for the kid, or maybe just have one that reads “survive 2010” as work has already gotten a little crazy and is likely only to get worse between now and my birthday.

How did you do on your resolutions?

The story of how this film came to be is an interesting one. Originally Peter Jackson and Neill Blomkamp were supposed to be working on a Halo movie which would have been Blomkamp’s first movie but when funding fell through Jackson made a deal to support Blomkamp making a different movie so that he would still have a shot at his first film. Eventually they decided to make District 9. It was shot as an independent film using cameras that Jackson owned and lent to the project. As an independent film they weren’t controlled by a large film studio and could thus cast unknown actors and make other choices far removed from corporate Hollywood influence. I think its genesis leads directly to some of the films greatest strengths – it’s unlike anything else in theatres and takes an unexpected approach and doesn’t conform to Hollywood formats.

This is just a fantastic film. It’s action, it’s science fiction (and I mean the kind of thought-provoking science fiction that would make Asimov and Roddenberry proud), it’s drama – it has a lot to offer much of which doesn’t always fall into our predetermined categories.

For example the main character is not at all what you’d expect. He seems a most unlikely hero, or villain for that matter, and frankly when we first met him I didn’t think he WAS the main character. He just seemed so inconsequential. I thought he was just someone who would accidentally set a chain of events into motion prior to the real protagonist showing up. But he doesn’t even fit into the stereotypes of an antihero or a reluctant hero. He starts off so seemingly innocent and naïve and before anything noteworthy happens you slowly start to see a slightly darker side of things like acceptable racism but it’s still in this soft innocent coating that the juxtaposition is a little surprising and intriguing and that’s when it hits you that this is a person. A 3 dimensional character that, to paraphrase Whitman, at times contradicts himself as he contains multitudes – as many people do. We’re used to seeing characters that have very few actual characteristics and if any of these change at all they tend to come in broad sweeping strokes that pivot on a central plot point – usually coming to realize they must do the right thing or some such. Wikus is much more complicated than that but that complication isn’t a burden to the viewer at all – if anything it makes the experience more human.

I could pontificate on the themes or the message, go on a rant about KBR/Halliburton (although why try when Keith Olbermann does it so well?) but that’s all for the individual to determine for themselves. It’s a great movie that makes you think but there are enough shades of gray that it doesn’t really force any ideology or conclusions on you. You can easily just enjoy it as a piece of entertainment.

It’s not a perfect movie, I could have done with him getting his hands on some alien weaponry a whole lot sooner and kicking ass for a bit longer but all things considered it’s a pretty minor criticism.

The aliens were easy to identify with because many of their faces, particularly that of the primary alien character, were actually rather reminiscent of Bumblebee from the recent Transformers movies.

I think they did an excellent job of setting up for a potential sequel. I mean, they moved them from District 9 to District 10 by the end after all so the title of the sequel is pre-made, logical, and easy for audiences to follow. And the time frame for the ship to return closely matches a film production schedule.

It became pretty apparent relatively early on that each of the numbered characters represented a different aspect of humanity or a specific human. In fact I believe it was about 15 minutes in that I said “engramatic transfer!” to my friend.

Oh, did I just ruin it for you? Don’t worry, it’s painfully obvious and you’ll still get to discover and debate which character is what part of humanity.

But on the off chance that I have accidentally ruined the film for you let me tell you the ending is unsatisfying. Not No Country For Old Men unsatisfying but it takes an unfortunate religious turn at the end. Frankly I find this to be poor writing – anyone can answer a question with “god did it” (which this film doesn’t, fear not) but it takes talent to come up with real-world solutions and explanations and meaning.

It’s an enjoyable film and visually intriguing and well worth watching so long as you keep your expectations in check – they sadly didn’t cover what I found to be the most interesting aspect of the story (how we got here and where we’re going afterwards) very well for my tastes but don’t let that stop you from seeing it.

I don’t get people who are against swine flu vaccines.

I’m not saying people should panic over swine flu and I agree it’s been over-reported and often not put in proper perspective but I also think if you don’t want the vaccine that’s fine, don’t get it (I haven’t) but by the same token as the media has put too much fear into people over the swine flu the fringe has put too much fear into people over the vaccine. Don’t panic and do what your doctor tells you, that’s my advice but I’m not going to force that opinion on people. And I’m not going to imply that people doing otherwise are uneducated - my doctor’s plenty educated and that’s good enough for me. If I didn’t trust him with my family’s health, well, I’d get a new doctor.

To be completely honest I haven’t decided if I’m going to get the shot or not (I think I was exposed in spring and am already immune anyways, about 75% chance of that being the case) - I’ll probably just get the shot at work. But as someone not in an at-risk group I’ll happily wait my turn. I took my son to get his shot and fully support anyone I know in an at-risk group getting theirs ASAP. But so long as hockey teams and wall street CEOs are pushing pregnant women and people with compromised immune systems out of their way to get it as someone not in an at-risk group I’m proud of waiting. Plus it gives me a bit more time to see if there are any complications which as far as I can tell (and I watch the news pretty carefully) there haven’t been any. Since April, 23 people have died of swine flu (or related complications) in BC, thus far I think the vaccine is still at zero.

My friend recently mentioned the top 5 reasons for not getting the swine flu shot that people have told him…here they are with my responses…

5. “I’ve never had the flu and never had the vaccine so I don’t need it”
That’s faulty logic but their choice.

4. “Last time I had the flu shot I got sick(er)”
Vaccine is dead, can’t replicate itself, last time they probably had the flu before the shot but the shot didn’t make it worse. I used to think this before I read up from multiple medical sources on what the shot actually is. Now I know better.

3. “It’s the media making this a big deal”
Fair enough. If they’re not in an at-risk group and just don’t want to expend the time I respect that and if the shot wasn’t coming to my workplace I might even be with them on this one.

2. “I am not convinced of the vaccine, they produced it too fast”
Fair enough, their choice. I prefer to accept the assessment of my doctor as he would know better how to evaluate it.

1. “It’s a government conspiracy”
They’re insane, what does government possibly stand to gain? Thus far it’s actually been a PR nightmare. U.S. and Canadian governments widely criticized for poor delivery and other planning. For those that truly believe this, Darwin may be calling. The sad part is if they do get swine flu it will feed right into their delusions and claim the government somehow gave it to them because they knew too much! Call Mulder and Scully! Sigh.

Speaking of news, apparently Swine Flu has plateaued recently…
http://www.news1130.com/more.jsp?content=20091112_173355_8980

I don’t get people who are against Remembrance Day.

Apparently some people (mistakenly in my opinion) think it glorifies war. As far as I’m concerned it reminds us of the horrors of war and why it is to be strenuously avoided (and of course to honour the fallen) - “Lest We Forget” after all. If the goal was to glorify war we’d say something like “we kicked ass” and instead of a moment of silence and day of remembrance they’re be raging parties or some such.

Other people are against Remembrance Day because many soldiers, particularly in World War I, were unwilling participants. I think the unwilling sacrifices deserve to be honoured as well as the willing and that should be, and often is, part of the story - part of what we’re not to forget so it doesn’t happen again.

The New Westminster-Coquitlam riding is facing a by-election Monday due to Dawn Black’s resignation to transfer to provincial politics so let’s take a look at the candidates…

NDP – Fin Donnelly
With a strong environmentalist like Fin running under the NDP banner in a recently NDP dominated riding I can’t image the left splitting its vote much at all with the Greens. Why vote Green when you have an environmental activist running with the NDP? It’s the best of both worlds.

Conservative – Diana Dilworth
A former city councilor she brings some political experience to the game but her focus seems to be taxation and hating the Liberals. Her slogan “stand up for Canada” doesn’t exactly make sense. Stand up against whom? She seems upset about alleged Liberal arrogance but I don’t see how any of this presents useful policies.

Liberal – Ken Lee
His mailer is all about Ignatieff rather than himself – it’s important and informative but it seems more like he’s being used to improve Ignatieff’s image than actually win the riding.

Green – Rebecca Helps
I could make a joke about her last name but it’s just too easy. Her background isn’t very impressive: a girl guide leader, instituted a recycling program at a junior high, and worked at Yellow Pages and BC Housing. She’s also still on about STV which I disagree with and has been rejected by voters two general provincial elections in a row.

Conclusions
Fin Donnelly is probably going to win by uniting in the left. Diana Dilworth is simply too negative. If you want to vote for Michael Ignatieff then vote for Ken Lee. I frankly don’t think Rebecca Helps has the comprehension for federal politics. So my recommendation is to vote NDP or if for some reason you have an aversion to doing so then go Liberal.

I’ve heard a lot of crazy and contradictory things since even the idea of a vaccine first came up. I’m about the farthest thing from a medical professional so when the media reported that they wanted young children to get the vaccine the week of November 2nd the decision was easy. Call the doctor and do whatever he says. He said get the shot.

So today was the first opportunity to get the kid his shot and according to the doc as well as the media it might be his last chance for a little while as the supply looks poised to dry up temporarily, partly due to queue-jumping hockey teams. The doctor’s office only administers the shot for one hour each day. It seemed a little odd but you play the hand that you’re dealt.

The day before I instituted No Thomas Day; the kid’s obsessed with Thomas and a break could do him good. Plus it was all part of the plan.

I began preparing to leave 90 minutes before we had to – getting dressed, packing a bag, that sort of thing. This included converting an hour long episode of Thomas for playback on my PDA.

I timed it so that we arrived 10 minutes early – we ended up 6th in line, the people immediately in front of us had been waiting 25 minutes already when we arrived and moments after we got there the line doubled. It seemed we arrived at just the right time – early enough for maximum efficiency but not so earl y as to be crazy.

So I busted out the headphones and the PDA and kept the kid at my side with some Thomas. Other parents looked at me with either admiration for my planning or contempt for the reliance on television rather than, say, a book.

The second group to go in was a couple of twins; we could hear their screams out in the hallway. This changed the remaining condescending looks from fellow parents to looks of regret and admiration as the screams caused great and often vocal anxiety in all the other children – which my son couldn’t hear. He was happy as a clam.

Knowing we were headed for a shot I dressed him appropriately in a t-shirt and button up shirt and jacket. Once in the room I got his jacket and shirt off and rolled up the sleeve on the t-shirt. He continued watching Thomas looking in the opposite direction of the exposed arm.

When the nurse came in she was shocked. She asked if we had already gotten the shot because we looked so prepared. I said no and mentioned that I hadn’t wiped the soon-to-be injection site with rubbing alcohol yet so she could do that if she wanted to feel useful. We had a chuckle. She needed to get a smaller needle and when she came back she brought a fellow nurse to show her what a prepared family looked like.

The shot took half a second. The kid made a face but beyond that you wouldn’t know that anything had happened. The nurse said she wanted to give us an award for best patient ever. As we left I overheard her telling another nurse about what great patients we were…well that was what I could make out over the screaming of the twins who were still tying up another room.

Drums

Easy
Interpol – PDA
Modest Mouse – Float On
The Go-Go’s – We Got The Beat

Medium
Billy Idol – White Wedding
Blondie - One Way Or Another
Cheap Trick - Hello There
Devo – Uncontrollable Urge
Dinosaur Jr. – Feel The Pain
Foo Fighters - Everlong
Guns N’ Roses – Shackler’s Revenge
Jane’s Addiction – Mountain Song
Jimmy Eat World – The Middle
Journey – Any Way You Want It [x4]
Journey – Don’t Stop Believing
L7 – Pretend We’re Dead
Lit – My Own Worst Enemy [x1]
Lush - De-Luxe
Nirvana – Drain You
Nirvana – Polly [x3]
Panic At The Disco – Nine In The Afternoon
Rage Against The Machine – Testify
Ratt - Round & Round
Smashing Pumpkins – Today
Speck – Conventional Lover [x2]
Survivor - Eye Of The Tiger
Talking Heads - Psycho Killer
The Donnas - New Kid In School
The Main Drag - A Jagged Gorgeous Winter
The Offspring – Come Out And Play (Keep ‘Em Separated) [x3]
The Replacements – Alex Chilton [x1]
The Who - Pinball Wizard [x2]
Tenacious D – Master Exploder
Alanis Morissette – Head Over Feet

Vocals

Easy
Duran Duran – Hungry Like The Wolf
L7 – Pretend We’re Dead
Oasis – Wonderwall [x4]
R.E.M. – Losing My Religion [x3]
Social Distortion - I Was Wrong
Smashing Pumpkins - Today

Guitar

Easy
Duran Duran – Girls On Film
Modest Mouse – Float On

Click for full image

When I started this blog a few years ago I had absolutely no idea I would spend as much time talking about television as I do now. In fact when Mindi first suggested it I thought it a rather dull topic. Of course back then the only TV shows that got me excited was 24 and…well…Daily Show and Colbert Report I guess. Much has changed since then. Knight Rider came and went, for example.

Now the show currently on the air that I find myself most looking forward to each week is FlashForward; a new offering this season from a slowly recovering ABC. I probably went a decade without watching ABC and without noticing. But last season a mid-season replacement caught my eye in the form of Castle – perfect right out of the gate. And now comes along FlashForward, also perfect from the start.

Back in the day, like in the late 80s for example, a show tended to run for a full season before properly finding its footing. Just look at the extremely uneven first season of The Next Generation for an example – hell they didn’t pull it together to produce consistently quality episodes until the third season. But FlashForward, Castle, 24, Big Bang Theory, and Chuck all seemed to start off nearly perfect in their implementation. The cast, the theme, the conflict, and the very heart of these shows were all polished right away. Had Knight Rider been given a second season I’m sure it would have gotten there but alas that’s a complaint for another day. The point is lately I have been blown over by the amount of quality programming that seems to know what it’s doing right away. I have to admit early in this decade I feared for the future of television – with Family Guy and Firefly cancelled 24 seemed to be our only hope but that concept was so challenging no one tried to duplicate it. I’m glad to say I think we’re living in, for me at least, the second coming of television. I never thought I’d see the day; I was honestly convinced that reality TV would kill us all. To hell with Skynet, we needed to stop Survivor.

So why am I putting FlashForward at the front of the pack? It’s just so gripping. I’m not saying it’s the best thing on television (although it could be) I’m saying it’s the thing you can’t wait to see the next episode of. Big Bang Theory and Castle are great but if you had to skip a week it wouldn’t be the end of the world. But the 24-like serialized nature of FlashForward is like a constant cliffhanger since the first episode – they don’t even have to invent new reasons to keep you watching, the premise is plenty. So in that one respect it has a leg up on 24, of course they’ll need to reinvent conflict for a second season but let’s cross that bridge when we come to it.

Some people have been comparing FlashForward to Lost and I haven’t watched enough Lost to know how valid that is (and I’m not going to) but if Lost had replaced “island” with “time travel” I probably would have given it a chance. That said, don’t try to convince me that if I like FlashForward I should watch Lost – it just ain’t gonna happen. You’re lucky I watched Castaway once. Islands don’t do it for me.

Actually I think FlashForward has a lot in common with 24. For one thing I noticed today on Wikipedia that the episodes are directed in couplets, which is to say one director will direct two episodes back-to-back. That method created great continuity on 24 and seems to be doing well for FlashForward as the directing styles and choices are fresh and engaging but don’t try to reinvent the wheel either. Also whereas 24 had each episode last a real-time hour FlashForward seems to loosely stick to the time frame in which it airs. It’s not perfect for obvious reasons – some episodes taking place back-to-back but airing over a period of 2 weeks and I suspect a Christmas hiatus is in the offing, although I’m less than thrilled at the prospect. I can’t help but notice that April 29th 2010, the day everyone Flash Forwarded to, is a Thursday – FlashForward airs on Thursdays. That’ll be a hell of a day and you can find me planted firmly in front of my TV that night. Unfortunately March 15th 2010 is a Monday but I think it’s more the Ides Of March that they were going for with that specific date. Oh and a cast member from season 4 of 24 fills the role of soothsayer in this particular plotline. And a Shakespeare reference in a show starring the guy from Shakespeare In Love? This show has lots of fun stuff to keep you involved.

Now all that said who will come out on top when 24 and Chuck come back in 2010? Well, that will be a wonderful dilemma, won’t it? For the first time since I discovered it I can picture a world after 24 has left the small screen that doesn’t completely suck.

Guess who/what I (and my family) are going to be for Halloween…

(click for full images)

It’s been brewing for awhile now, don’t pretend you haven’t noticed. You may have even joined a facebook group showing your support for one side or the other but do you truly understand the issues?

There’s a reason I haven’t waded in on this subject yet – I didn’t feel as if I knew enough to choose a side. One side wants local TV to survive and the other claims they’re just trying to create a new tax to buy more foreign content. One side is making tons of money and claiming it’s the other side that’s incompetent and after cash. It’s all very confusing and contradictory. I haven’t done much research but I’ve thought about it a bunch and here’s how I come down on this little dust-up…

My first inclination is to side with local TV – they’re the underdog and haven’t gone as wildly negative as the cable companies have.

This all started because cable companies rebroadcast local channels without paying them for the content. They’re selling something they don’t own, didn’t create, didn’t buy, and never paid a dime for. That doesn’t strike me as the slightest bit fair. And if that wasn’t enough they even use the logos of local networks in their advertising materials. So it seems like cable is in the wrong here based on simple morality.

The situation got worse when advertising money dried up due to the financial crisis – car companies are usually one of the biggest advertisers and they haven’t exactly had money to burn lately. So the cable companies are branding this as local TV being incompetent and needing a bailout. I suppose leaner and meaner organizational structures could help but clearly that’s not enough.

What we have here is a common goods problem. Cable TV takes and gives nothing back from local TV and now local TV is withering from a variety of factors. Cable companies seem to lack the foresight to see that if local TV stations fall, it will hurt cable in the long run. It’s short-term greed over long-term viability. These groups should have a synergistic relationship, not a parasitic one. I pay extra for time shifting so I can watch broadcasts from other parts of Canada, if those local stations go under I won’t need that add-on anymore. And that’s just one example.

I also have to hand it to local TV for pointing out the crazy rate increases cable has pulled over the last few years – well above inflation and cost of living. In fact not too long ago I called to complain about an increase I was only told about a month after it went into effect – in the end they did nothing and blamed the increase on fuel prices. Are they driving the shows to my house in a Hummer or something? Add a fuel surcharge to installation or service calls if that’s the problem – raising everyone’s rates without telling them is a cash grab.

So what’s our way out of this mess?

Should local TV have the right to charge for rebroadcast of its content on cable? Absolutely. Should local TV be able to sue companies that use it’s logos without permission? Certainly. As I understand it neither of these is the case however. So first off these things need to change at whatever level that is required but that alone won’t solve the problem.

The problem is monopolistic tendencies of the cable companies. Ant-trust and anti-collusion laws need to be enforced on cable companies.

In my region we used to have Rogers Cable but then some big corporate deal decided that Rogers would get Central Canada and Shaw would get Western Canada and they would stay off of each other’s turfs to save money. That’s collusion (when two or more companies in the same industry work together when they’re supposed to be competing against each other). 2 large companies with combined near-complete market share agreeing not to compete and carving up the country like colonial Africa or something. At the time I was too young to understand just how wrong it was. And now we’re reaping the crop of these seeds of anti-competitive monopolistic behavior.

But what about Bell and Telus TV and the new Rogers service you ask?

Bell’s prices are pretty decent but for many people a satellite dish is not feasible – if they live in an apartment building or rent their home they may not be allowed by the owner, not have access to where they need to adjust it, not have the necessary line-of-sight…the list goes on. Plus I’m not fond of satellite technology for TV but that could just be my ignorance and inexperience talking.

As for Rogers and Telus, they don’t provide service in my area. And it’s not like I live in the country or anything. I don’t even live in a suburb. I live in a city with over half a million people in it according to the 2006 census and counting the surround metropolitan area that number jumps to over 2 million as of 3 years ago. I live less than 3 miles from the center of the city. I used to have a cell phone with Telus for about a decade and found their service fantastic; I would seriously consider switching if I were able but I am apparently out of both of their service areas. It’s 2009 for God’s sake – when did less than 3 miles become an insurmountable hurdle for technology? I can get wireless internet on a laptop or blackberry but no cable TV alternative?

So unless I try a satellite dish, which I may not even be allowed to do, I have precisely one choice when it comes to TV. This is not how capitalism is supposed to work. And besides, why bother? It seems like these companies have a pretty congenial relationship anyways, how is it likely to be any different even if I could switch?

Oh, and what’s with cable TV including the CBC in it’s hit list in those attack ads? You’re going to war with people you’ve been stealing from, a war likely to be decided by the government, and you decide to attack the national broadcaster supported largely by federal funding? You’re going to call THEM incompetent and greedy? Their president is appointed by the Prime Minister – you’re not exactly helping your case before government here. Heck, forget all that – you’re going to pick a fight with the oldest existing broadcasting service in Canada? The people who bring us hockey? If you think you can win a war for the hearts and minds of Canadians against Don Cherry you’ve clearly gotten too big for your own good.

So here’s my prescription:

Step One: Government has to allow local TV to charge for rebroadcast of their product.

Step Two: Government has to allow local TV to go to go court to protect its brand.

Step Three: Government needs to step in and stop anti-competitive actions by these huge cable companies. They either need to break up these companies into smaller units, hold them legally accountable for collusion, or in areas where competition is not viable fix their rate of price increases to the rate of inflation until such time as competition is present in the market or do some combination or perhaps even all three.

I suppose the only alternative is to cancel your cable altogether and get whatever you need off the internet, legal or otherwise, but even then guess who has a stranglehold on the internet provider market.

When the government, big business, or the market doesn’t provide moral, ethical, and legal alternatives what are we to do? I’m more than willing to pay a fair price for cable TV but the prices aren’t fair and the money isn’t going to the people who create the content. If it’s legal for cable TV to steal its TV shows and make a huge profit off of it how can it be illegal to steal TV shows and not make a profit at all? It seems that pirates now have the moral high ground on the cable companies. How about that?

The bumper boats area is dismally small and the mini golf area looked decent but you need to face facts, this place is all about the sand dunes.

We took that half hour tour and it was worth every penny. It was absolutely amazing, the views, the speed, the angles they take the buggy on will blow your mind. And it’s informative too.

When you buy your ticket(s) make sure to get some advice regarding attire and cameras and then follow that advice to the letter if possible. Every inch of exposed skin will get a slight exfoliation care of the sand and the wind. Cameras should be kept in a zippered pocket and only brought out when stopped and even then you probably don’t want to bring your most expensive piece of equipment.

This is one of those experiences that you actually have to do, it’s difficult to describe and nearly impossible to do it justice with mere words. If you’re in the area do this at least once, you won’t regret it.

Located just off the I-5 (although not that easy to find) this is a great place to stay on a trip somewhere else but if Portland is your destination it’s not particularly near anything except a Denny’s and a small strip mall. The staff was polite and friendly although when we had some difficulty with our toilet it did take them a while to take care of it.

The best feature by far is the heated indoor pool which is actually open 24 hours for adults along with a hot tub. The pool isn’t very large but the temperature is perfect. Again, this is ideal for people on a long road trip as you may arrive after most hotels close their pools.

The rooms are spacious and fantastic. The room we got had two distinct rooms, a bedroom and a living room with a kitchenette. I was very pleased to discover the fridge in our room and boy did it keep things cold.

There is still a lot of the Phoenix Inn branding about but that doesn’t take away from the experience at all. The bathtub did appear to be recently repaired and had a slight spring to it but otherwise was fine.

Not only is there free WiFi but you have 2 very fast servers to choose from and they had a computer in the lobby you can use as well. This was a lifesaver for me when I needed to do some banking that my PDA just couldn’t handle.

I was so impressed with this property I found myself thinking of excuses to come to Portland again just to enjoy it once more.

I don’t want to be old-man-telling-you-to-get-off-his-lawn but I think I need to have a Grandpa Simpson moment here.

I have been somewhat upset with the semi-recent trend devaluing dignity and privacy in popular culture of late.

So we don’t get bogged down in details let’s say since the new millennium began for the purposes of this discussion.

It’s like the only privacy people respect any more is your credit card number, that we all agree should be kept confidential but when it comes to just about anything else it seems the lowest common denominator won the war when we weren’t looking.

Personally I think reality TV shoulders some of the blame here. No one short of The Enquirer has made airing out your dirty laundry in as public a venue as possible as popular as reality TV. I hate reality TV and avoid it every which way I can and I STILL know Vern Troyer is a nasty drunk. I don’t care. That’s none of my business. I would love to forget that little bit of trivia. Reality TV has turned public scandal into an industry. Look at that Balloon Boy or Bubble Boy or whatever they’re calling him – his mom went on Wife Swap and now the family thinks crying and vomiting on national TV will make them rich.

It’s a cancer.

People post on Facebook when they’re horny or tweet about the specific symptoms of their most recent menstrual cycle. Don’t blame the internet, it’s just a medium. If we didn’t have crap like that forced down our throats on reality TV we’d be less inclined to share the most private of personal details online.

When did dignity become so devalued? Take a moment and try to think of people who you think have dignity and class; who you respect on those grounds. Let’s see who I can come up with…

Barack Obama

…man this is hard…

Jon Stewart
Wil Wheaton

Hey, there’s a great example. Wil Wheaton. Mr. Twitter himself. He doesn’t share his private moments at the cost of his dignity. He shares humourous private moments and wry observations but he maintains his dignity even when being self deprecating.

I run this blog and admittedly in the past I may have discussed some things that should have remained private so I’m no angel in this tale but perhaps I’m just one of the many caught up in the currents of popular trends. A falling tide lowers all ships I guess.

Since when did private become synonymous with close-minded, boring, or secretive? Why is privacy something that can’t be respected anymore? Sure we want an open government but how about the privacy of our personal lives? There are some places where accountability and privacy are not mutually exclusive or at war with each other.

I think we all need to stand up and declare: “I have dignity and I have a private life. I have class. There are some things in my life that are for me and my family alone. There are some things that I will not do at the cost of my dignity”.

Go on, say it if it’s true. If it’s not, ask yourself why.

Here’s the reply from Cineplex, see if you can wade through all the crap to get to their response to my actual complaint…

Thank you for contacting Cineplex Entertainment regarding our concession combos.  We have recently introduced new combos for a number of our food offerings. These offers are subject to change on an ongoing basis and are continually assessed against a number of factors- including updated menus and feedback from our guests. We strive to convey a balance of value and choice in all such offers.  In response to guest feedback, the most recent change expands the number of candy items that can be bundled within a combo. Despite the change to our offering and our menu panels, we have not increased any of our core concession prices to the items included in the bundles. Also, you may see new combos which your theatre may not have offered in the past.   The a la carte prices for all of our products are advertised on menu boards as well as the specific savings associated with the purchase of products in the advertised bundles.  We greatly appreciate the feedback that you have provided as it is invaluable in our ongoing efforts to deliver compelling menu options for our guests.

I am extremely dissappointed in your decision to remove the prices for combos from all of your signs. When I asked one of your staff why this was done he said “it’s so you can focus on savings, not what you’re spending”. This is outrageous. How can you possibly offer a product without informing people beforehand of the price? For as long as you continue this practice I plan to eat elsewhere before or after any movie I go to see. This offends me as a consumer and I refuse to purchase anything without knowing the price beforehand - this new practice of yours is completely unacceptable. I await your reply and will be watching for a change in this policy before I open my wallet for food at your establishment again.

With a sign at the street that simply reads ‘Restaurant’ and a cursive sign on top of the building that reads ‘Della’s’ this location might be easy to miss. On the outside it looks like any family restaurant and inside as well. At the tables they have cute little trivia quizzes to help you pass the time.

The service is decent but they have the disturbing trend of asking you for your drink order before you sit down. How can I order if I’m still standing and haven’t seen a menu? I suppose that’s just prompt service taken a step too far.

The food is good. In fact if you don’t have the teriyaki chicken dinner entrée it is a mistake you’ll regret. This unassuming little family restaurant has some of the best teriyaki chicken I’ve ever had – they put places that specialize in this kind of food to shame. The bread is also fantastic, the salad is decent. Their mashed potatoes have an odd taste to them that makes me suspect they weren’t made from scratch and the gravy they put on it only makes it worse.

The prices are reasonable, two dinner entrees and soft drinks will run you about $32 USD including a decent tip.

Overall the fantastic chicken, atmosphere, and excellent value more than makes up for any shortcomings and provides a nice break from franchise chain restaurants.

This place really does what it says on the tin. The free WiFi was great. The outdoor pool is only dawn till dusk which is understandable.

The shower stall did present a bit of a problem as the shower head is only about 5 feet above the floor so anyone taller than 5 feet has to duck under and limbo or perform some other act of contortionism if they want to wash their hair and the shower stall isn’t that big adding an extra layer of challenge.

The check in and out process was smooth, efficient, and friendly – no faults whatsoever on the staff.

There is an in-room safe and $1.50 will be added to your bill unless you tell them you aren’t going to use it but the good news is they are very upfront about this and only need to be told once.

The air conditioner is a bit of a problem. The controls are older and yet somewhat complicated so check all the dials when you’re adjusting it. Also, and far more importantly, it’s pretty loud so you’ll need earplugs if you plan to leave it on overnight.

The room was neither spacious nor cramped; it was more or less just what you’d need.

It seems that people tend to check in late and leave early at this hotel. When we left for a late dinner there were only 2 cars in the parking lot, when we came back a few hours later it was packed and the next morning it was completely empty.

The area is pretty good, there are quite a few food options within walking distance such as a restaurant, a Carl’s Jr., a DQ, a Mexican place and many more.

So other than a couple infrastructure issues this is a pretty good place to stay.

It’s out of the way, a trick and a half to get to if you don’t know exactly where you’re going, and not near any other attractions. In fact it’s in a strange part of town with retirement homes next to Lamborghini dealerships, an odd mix of new and rather old but not nearly antique or classic.

The setup is a little odd, food is served like a cafeteria but drinks are more like a pub. Their payment options are nonexistent; its cash only so come prepared not to use any plastic. It’s certainly a unique place but not worth any special effort. The meat is good but the bread is subpar. The décor is just a bunch of old pub signs which I imagine must appeal to someone, just not me.

I know this place has been featured on some Food Network programs but unless you’re a gastronome this place doesn’t really offer much.

You may have noticed a drop off in blog entries of late but that’s largely because I’ve been sick as a dog lately.

Say that these days and the first thought or question in everyone’s head is: Is it Swine Flu?

Well this is what the news has to say about spotting it…
“Doctors say a combination of sore throat, cough, fever, and aches and pains could mean you do have the Swine Flu”

So let’s self-diagnose.

Sore Throat: Nope
Cough: Nope (I may have coughed 2 or 3 times total in the last week)
Fever: Nope (I may have been a little warm but nothing noteworthy)
Aches: Nope
Pains: Nope

Things I am suffering from include: running nose, fatigue, reduced appetite (I’ve actually lost a little weight), dizziness, dry mouth, and weird dreams…and just last night a touch of insomnia.

So for those of you concerned about H-one-to-the-N-one let me put your concerns aside for now. I ain’t well but I ain’t oinking yet.

The LA Times calls The Cleveland Show a keeper, I respectfully disagree.

Now the LA Times doesn’t go into a lot of detail as to why they think so but from the tone of the overall article its analysis seems to be based on ratings.

Well let me point out a couple things.

First, The Cleveland Show is, diabolically, placed between new episodes of The Simpsons and Family Guy, both of which are producing some quality product right now.

Second, The Cleveland Show airs during an uncontested half hour on Sunday nights. Seriously, there’s nothing else on – God knows I’ve looked. Even if MSNBC was airing a repeat of Meet The Press or Friday night’s episodes of Countdown or Rachel Maddow I’d switch for the half hour.

And the simple fact is half an hour isn’t long enough to do much of anything else. Just get into a video game and then have to stop, wash a sink full of dishes without time to dry them. It’s just far easier to leave the TV on and check your e-mail, tidy up a bit, or heaven forbid actually talk to the people you live with. They could air a news program in that half hour and get similar ratings but those ratings don’t necessarily mean people are paying attention.

Which brings me to my third point, The Cleveland Show sucks. I know only two episodes have aired thus far so Jon would probably point out that I haven’t given it a serious chance but once Cleveland left Spooner Street it averages about 2 mild guffaws per half hour with me. And I’m a guy who loves his comedy. I’ll laugh at a lot. When it comes to comedy I like to think I’m easy to please but The Cleveland Show just doesn’t do it for me. The humour is, at best, dated.

And the most interesting character is also the most ludicrous. I mean, randomly having a bear for a neighbor is exactly the kind of absurd focus-group-driven plot device that Family Guy would mock mercilessly on other shows. It’s like Poochie on The Simpsons and yet he’s thus far the only hope for the show. His accent is hard to place and amusing, he says funny things, and his bear-ness provides a not-entirely-subtle counterfoil to the racial stereotypes that typify the rest of the characters. Oddly enough using the bear as a metaphor for racism is one of the few promising concepts the show has but it only seems to flirt with the idea.

Picking Cleveland for his own show was where everything started to go wrong. He’s a minor character on Family Guy that the writers seem to have run out of things to do with. I understand the practical reason of giving the spinoff to a character that Seth MacFarlane doesn’t do the voice for because the guy would be overworked into an early grave and we would have lost something special as a result but I think perhaps we’re going to his well a little too much now. Thankfully Family Guy hasn’t suffered – which also speaks to Cleveland’s lack of value as a character.

One of the other networks really needs to challenge Fox on Sunday nights, particularly during this half hour or else Fox can just keep churning out this crap and people like the LA Times will continue to think it’s gold just because no one else is stepping up to the microphone. Seriously, The Cleveland Show and American Dad are still around but Knight Rider got cancelled? Where’s the justice in that?

We took the one-hour bay cruise and found it to be pretty fantastic. The price is reasonable and there are frequent sailings. The person you talk to before buying tickets was quite knowledgeable. If you don’t have the time to see everything in depth this is an exciting and informative overview.

The audio guide is at different times hit and miss but it’s generally good to keep it on because you never know when some fascinating or useful piece of information may come along and it’s easy to ignore when that’s not the case. The ship itself is no cruise line but it’s sturdy and ideal for its purpose.

The cruise takes you to the Golden Gate Bridge, even going underneath it and around a pillar and then goes around Alcatraz on the far side before heading back.

I went to the old location of the San Francisco Hard Rock Café in September of 2002, little did I know at the time that several months prior they had decided to change locations and move down to Pier 39. I have to say I prefer the old location. Apparently this new location seats more people but it actually feels quite a bit smaller. It’s less exuberant than your run-of-the-mill Hard Rock Café; in fact I would go so far as to say it was the lowest energy location I’ve visited of the chain.

They did have some nice new HDTVs but not all of them were of the same quality, so depending on what direction you were facing you were either blown away by picture quality of the videos or unimpressed.

The food and drinks however we top-notch as always. That’s one constant a traveler can always depend on – it doesn’t matter if you’re in Las Vegas, Berlin, or San Francisco the food and drinks are consistently fantastic at the Hard Rock Café.

I had planned my visit to coincide with my birthday since the Hard Rock Café in Orlando had done such a fantastic job a couple years prior but once I arrived at this location with its dampened spirit I just didn’t have it in me to mention to anyone.

So overall great food and drinks but don’t expect the usual Hard Rock Café personality or exuberance.

First, the obvious tips: buy your tickets online and get there right at open. I generally go to amusement parks in September when I can because they’re generally not very busy but this rule only has a limited effect on a Six Flags. It doesn’t matter what time of year it is – it will get busy.

Medusa is still one of the best rollercoasters in the world. You go up two flights of stairs to board this beast and then the first thing it does is take you up…and up…and then up some more. It’s a smooth but incredibly fast ride which is the perfect combination for me.

Kong is the floorless rollercoaster although Medusa doesn’t exactly have your feet firmly planted anywhere either. It’s a little more jarring than Medusa and while not as tall seems to do more to you.

The Boomerang is a unique ride and coming from an amusement park enthusiast that’s saying something. It’s worth doing but seemed to have one of the shortest lines in the park so I would leave this ride to last or second-to-last when the park is busier.

White Water Safari is fantastic, along with Medusa easily one of my favorite rides in the park but watch out because if you’re in the wrong seat you’ll get beyond wet. This is very similar to the Bluto’s Barge ride at Islands Of Adventure in Orlando. This ride also did not have a significant line-up in September.

In 2002 I went to the park with a friend of mine who was in the Navy, he took one look at V2 and decided we weren’t going on it. Well this time I finally I got to it and it’s actually a pretty smooth ride. The fastest ride in the park the most enjoyable part is actually shooting straight along the tunnel. This thing isn’t nearly as scary as it looks but I guess its looks are enough to keep the line-ups down.

Roar is the bumpiest ride in the park. It would be a great ride if only you weren’t constantly being slammed into the interior. I understand the appeal of the wooden rollercoaster and I would definitely recommend you go on this ride but only once lest you end up with a headache and possibly bruises. I prefer rides to thrill me, not hurt me.

Monsoon Falls doesn’t really compare to White Water Safari at all but it’s still fun, don’t forget to stop and watch from the bridge on your way out. Try standing just to the side of where the ride runs – or better yet put your friend there.

So the rides with significant line-ups are Medusa, Kong, Roar, and Monsoon Falls – I recommend you do these first before the line-ups build. The rest you can do at a leisurely pace afterwards without losing hours of your life.

And of course there are the animals, too numerous to mention but I suggest leaving these until after the rides as they tend to have a larger capacity or just have people move through them faster.

As for food I have to strongly recommend against eating at the Johnny Rocket’s. The service is poor (although prompt), the price is astronomical (even for an amusement park), the food is substandard (makes McDonald’s look gourmet), the presentation is awkward and oftentimes you won’t be able to find a napkin, straw, or ketchup packet to save your life. Don’t even think about ordering a milkshake, they serve it in a glass that is far too small and you’ll end up wearing most of it even if it is the only part of the meal that tastes good.

If you have young children it would be cruel and unusual punishment not to take them to Thomas Town, they’ve truly created something special for the younger ones in that corner of the park.

The lockers are $10 a day but with unlimited in-and-out it’s well worth it – although the change is all coin so watch out if you pay with a $20.

Overall, this Six Flags has something for everyone and is not to be missed.

This Hyatt is not well marked so if you don’t look at pictures of the front beforehand you may have some difficulty finding it but once you do you’re in for a treat. The staff is extraordinarily pleasant. We ended up upgrading our room to an Oversize King option so I can’t speak for the regular rooms. The location is fantastic; you’re within easy walking distance to Fisherman’s Wharf if you go down the hill and Ghirardelli Square if you go along the street. There are other sights you could try walking to but I wouldn’t recommend it and the #47 bus goes right by the front and that will take you to most of the more distant places you’d want to check out.

Parking is insanely expensive but San Francisco is a unique case when it comes to parking, you can park for about $32 per day if you’re willing to walk 2 blocks from a nearby parking garage at the Walgreen’s which is actually a significant savings over what the Hyatt wants to charge.

They do love to charge you for everything. Internet either on TV or WiFi (but not both!) is an extra $10 per day. The TV Internet is dodgy, the wireless keyboard needs a perfect line of sight to work and even then you better hunt and peck because anything faster won’t work. Frankly I’d rather have something wired to the desk that works than a fancy wireless keyboard I could try to use in bed that doesn’t. And the controls are far from intuitive, read the menus carefully before proceeding. It’s a little outrageous when you think any Motel 6 charges $3 for WiFi per day and at a Travelodge it’s usually free but with the money you’re paying to stay at a Hyatt it’s more expensive than most other places. I suppose their regular guests can afford it and the business people can write it off anyways. They have the $5 bottles of water but that’s fine with the vending machines and Walgreen’s nearby and pretty standard. They do provide free whitening toothpaste though which I thought was a nice touch, and plenty of towels and pillows all around.

The TV was nice and well placed. The room came with a coffee maker but the coffee it produced wasn’t worth the time, two sips and the rest you want to send down the drain. The desk/TV stand was very handy and had electrical outlets coming out its ears in very convenient locations which we appreciated. The phone by the bed however had so much static on the line it was incredibly hard to hear who you were calling. The décor was fantastic.

The bathroom was very modern and stylish which was nice but the door wasn’t really a door so much as a sliding wood panel as if you were stepping into a closet and it was a heavy wood with no proper handle so you really had to thrown your back into moving that thing and it didn’t have a lock which wasn’t a concern for us but may be for others. The bathroom was large; there was no bath in our room but rather a very modern-looking shower where water essentially cascades out of the ceiling. It sounds great but the pressure isn’t the greatest and since you can’t really adjust the head coverage is splotchy.

Overall we were really impressed however the room did lack one thing – there was actually very little information about the hotel itself. It mentioned some services and numbers you could call which was grand but it didn’t have, for example, the hours of the pool. Nor did it state if local calls were free, which they almost always are but after the price of their internet access I began to wonder. It had a room service menu and some limited information about their restaurant but after 11pm it all pretty much shuts down. What good is room service that stops before midnight? Usually room service is a godsend when you get back late at 3am or something and want a good meal.

On the whole this is an excellent location if you can afford it but don’t expect the greatest value and while they do the grand flourishes and stylistic touches fantastically they seem to sometimes lose sight of the practical.

When we checked in it was late so the regular lobby was closed. The woman who checked us in was rude, very curt, and clearly did not want me there. She seemed to get angry with me for not knowing what she wanted before she told me and for giving her too much information. She became upset and frustrated when I provided a printout of the confirmation e-mail instead of my ID even though she hadn’t asked for ID. She seemed very put out by the fact that I couldn’t read her mind. The rest of the check in process consisted of her snapping orders at me. We didn’t bother asking for information or a second room key because we just didn’t want the confrontation she was so off-putting. Not once did she say ‘please’ and the only “thank you” I got was at the end when she made it very clear she was happy she wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore, so proper manners would have been better.

That said, the person who helped us check out was very polite.

The pool was small but clean and cool which is ideal for warmer weather but not so great at the end of the day.

It’s somewhat within walking distance to the Six Flags if you’re feeling adventurous. There’s a McDonald’s across the highway but no direct pedestrian access so you’ll still want to drive to it.

They have someone patrolling the parking lot at night which is reassuring.

The room itself is your standard Motel 6 offering, clean and perhaps a bit more spacious than usual.

Vacation is a time when I let loose and stop worrying about money – that’s part of the vacation covenant and I don’t want to do anything to break that however I leaned very heavily on my Visa this trip and given some of the difficulties I encountered that bares further thought before any future trips.

For the first time in over a decade I was faced with the prospect of my Visa card being rejected. First it was because of unusual account activity which is normal when you forget to tell them you’re going on vacation, although apparently my mother had taken care of that for me. That one case is generally easy to rectify with a simple phone call which is exactly what happened. But then on the last day of the trip my card started getting randomly rejected. Denny’s, McDonald’s, and automated parking meters would just say ‘Not Approved’ while bookstores, for example, accepted it just fine. When I called Visa after the first instance at Denny’s they said it was a problem with the merchant not my card and that my card would be fine. When the other instances occurred I was on the road and running behind so I didn’t have time for another lengthy phone call where I get put on hold twice for 10 or 20 minutes at a go. So for that last day we pooled our cash and never made purchases above what we had on hand (which wasn’t much), just in case. Gas stations and Carl’s Jr. took my card thankfully and had they not we could have probably just gone to an ATM or bank and paid some insane fees to get cash but it was still somewhat worrying.

Also when I got home there was a little bit of sticker shock with regards to how much I spent, only by a couple hundred dollars versus what I had figured I’d spend but that number was already significant to begin with, essentially an entire paycheque. I think it’s safe to say it’s the most I’ve ever spent on vacation before, although it also lasted at least a day longer than my last few vacations. I’m not entirely upset about that as the economy, particularly in two of the three states we visited, really needed the injection of spending and it was a rather special vacation but at the same time I don’t know that I want either the Visa problems or the sticker shock to become a habit so I thought I would take a look at the trip like I do in one of my one-month challenges. Not for recriminations or might-have-beens but rather just better understand what I did. As such I will talk exclusively in percentages rather than dollar amounts. Keep in mind I am only looking at Visa charges during the trip itself (so cash purchases like concert merch are not included); these figures do not include pre-purchased things like the Grants Pass hotel or concert tickets.

Here’s the breakdown…

Merchandise: 24%
Restaurants: 24%
Gas: 22%
Hotels: 18%
Entertainment: 10%
Fast Food: 3%

First some notes. I included pizza delivery under Restaurants on a count of you tip the delivery person. I included Krispy Kreme doughnuts under Merchandise because we didn’t eat them on the trip. Hotels represent the Motel 6s we stayed at and the upgrade and other fees at the Hyatt – since this does not include all the prepaid accommodations like the Travelodge, original Hyatt charge, or the Wilsonville Inn & Suites it can probably just be ignored. Merchandise also presents a unique case as I did almost all of my Christmas shopping for my son on this trip so that’s hardly frivolous and will represent future savings. I also included things like batteries and wiper fluid in Merchandise which were both usual vacation purchases. I also think my hunt for tax-free used Final Fantasy games was a bit of a one-off (both in goals and success rate – 4 games!!! I was just hoping for 1!) and I’m likely to get months of entertainment out of those.

Looking forward I doubt my next serious (i.e. non-minibreak) vacation will be a road trip so Gas shouldn’t be much of an issue unless renting a car and even then shall be much less. I did splurge on Entertainment but there were some unique opportunities like the San Francisco Bay Cruise and Dune Buggies that were both well worth it, in the future this could easily go either way depending on location – I’m sure my Vegas Entertainment percentage would have been pretty significant as well.

So there doesn’t appear to be any general conclusions that can be drawn other than $50 cash per day is not nearly enough even when you prepay for many accommodations and entertainment (like Six Flags and concerts) and that this was a pretty awesome and exceptional trip.

For once I’m getting an immediate start to editing the road trip videos. I posted the teaser as fast as the technology would allow. Now the first two episodes of Season 5 are online. I announced their release with links on Twitter and mentioned them on Facebook but I thought I’d keep you blog folks in the loop too…

5×01 Technology Hates Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmEUwoianIQ
Alternate title was “How To Over Prepare For A Road Trip”

5×02 Portland Doesn’t Deserve It’s Own Episode
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HMUbJDncPg
No disrespect to Portland but we spend half an episode getting there and then don’t find anything worth filming once we arrive. Deer in Blaine, technology still hates me, and a giant R on the side of a mountain…I don’t pretend to understand.

5×03 will probably be all about Six Flags and 5×04 is the one everyone’s been waiting for…

Stay tuned.